Guest Spotlight: DJ Bob Proehl

Nick and Bob went to high school together. They got to know each other in a Technical Designing class where they learned two-point perspective and did some architectural drafting. The focus of the class was on Design and Drawing for Production. Nick and Bob sat next to each other in class and really hit it off. Bob inspired Nick to explore and appreciate older music, including the Beatles. Nick used to play Super Nintendo with Bob and his brothers at Bob's house. Nick got to know Bob's family really well and enjoyed visiting with Bob's parents as well. Then Bob went off to SUNY Geneseo, where Nick made trips out to see him and hang out.

Bob now lives in Ithaca with his wife Heather, whom he married in 2009 and Alex. Bob works in Marketing and Web Management for Buffalo Street Books. He earned his MA in English at Boston University. Bob operated No Radio Records, an independent record store and performance space for several years. He DJs in Ithaca under the name AutoMatic Buffalo. His book, The Gilded Palace of Sin, on the slight rise and quick fall of the Flying Burrito Brothers, was released in 2008 from Continuum Press.

Melaina met Bob during our first trip to Buffalo. Nick, Melaina and Bob met for a drink at the Adam's Mark hotel bar, which is where Bob made the incredibly generous offer to DJ our wedding! We are both looking forward to seeing Bob in August and to meeting Heather and Alex! THANK YOU, BOB, for gifting us your DJ services. What an honor and what an amazing gift!

Interview with Groomsman Pete Moller

I sent Pete an email asking for some stories about his friendship with Nick that I could share with you and this was his highly entertaining response...

"I first met Nick at the Jackson Hole News in Wyoming, as a new & slightly overwhelmed ad photographer. Nick--newer than me, and not yet 21--possessed even then an uncanny and effortless ability to understand Process, Art & Technology so fluently, I was immediately impressed & hopelessly jealous. He also played chess, was a gifted guitarist, and rocked the most baddass, Buffalo black salt-eaten Lincoln I'd ever seen.

"Bromance was in the air...

"A week or two later my buddy John & I got kicked out of the place we were crashing at. Someone located a cheap, derelict duplex full of shameful bachelors fleeing town. But we needed a third man. Nick was the dude. Also, he knew girls. A couple of whom moved in immediately. Our friend Ron arrived from California. The House of Shame was born.

"Within a year or two, our various trajectories had flung us in the four directions. But I always look back on those days with fondness & appreciation. Nick taught me how to bake a fucking pizza, use computers without fear, and introduced me to the music of Tom Waits... All of which remain indispensable to life."

Pete now lives in Pennsylvania with his girlfriend Kate Davis. I can't wait to meet them both at our wedding in August!

Guest Spotlight: Robin Jauch

This is our second in our series of guest spotlights. Today we are featuring Nick's cousin Robin. Robin is Nick's Mom's sister Karen's daughter. I made this "family tree" which shows each of Nick's Mom's 9 sisters and underneath each sister is a list of their respective children (click on the image to enlarge):

So Robin and Nick have known one another for their entire lives.

In this photo, Robin is pictured with another one of their cousins, Hannah, whom we are hoping will also attend our wedding.

Robin lives in Buffalo with her husband Dave and their son Davey. She grew up in Los Angeles and is a certified English teacher. Robin's husband Dave loves rock music and plays the drums. Baby Davey was born at home, weighing 10 pounds, 10 ounces!

I hope you're studying all these details because we may have a pop quiz at the wedding. ;-)

Guest Spotlight: Lisa Lebel

Lisa is Nick's cousin Shannon's wife. (Shannon is one of Nick's groomsmen, so you'll hear more about Shannon later). Lisa and Shannon met at a frat party their freshman year in college and the rest is history.

Lisa and Nick met early on because Shannon and Nick were really close. Lisa and Shannon went to Nick's old apartment in Buffalo quite often. Lisa reports, "we would always do the same things - watch sports and they would play and talk about poker while I sat there bored out of my mind..haha..but I loved going there and hanging out with the two of them, listening to them laugh...good times."

Melaina first met Lisa, along with a lot of Nick's family members, at Lisa and Shannon's wedding last year. Lisa loves to ice skate and is addicted to Thai tea lattes. Her favorite work-out class is called Body Pump. We are super excited that Lisa and Shannon are expecting a baby! And coincidentally, their baby's expected due date is Melaina's birthday - July 6th! We are looking forward to meeting the newest Lebel at our wedding in August.

Busy with all our DIY projects

Nick and I are doing a lot of DIY for our wedding. I'm so excited and having so much fun, though it is a bit more work than I'd anticipated. So far we've made:

1. the Save-The-Dates
2. felt flower bouquets for the bride and all of the bridesmaids
3. table numbers and centerpieces
4. some props for the photobooth

I've also started several other projects that are works-in-progress, including:

-the cake topper
-red birdcage veils for each of the bridesmaids
-boutonnieres for each of the groomsmen
-birdcage veil to go with my reception dress
-an Activity Book to keep the kids entertained
-the card box

But the big project right now is making our wedding invitations, which has already involved days (not just hours - yes, days) of cutting paper.

Nick is busy working on the card box. I'm so proud of him! He has already worked hard cutting and sanding the wood and screwing the box together. It hasn't been painted yet, but it already looks so beautiful:

So WHEN and WHERE is your wedding?

As we have passed the one year mark before our "so-called wedding date" of 8/20/11 (so-called only because the date may change if our venue is not available for that day), more and more folks are asking for more specifics about our wedding. In fact, I myself have been getting pretty anxious about these first two decisions - when and where. I found a "Wedding Count-Down" To Do List in a magazine and those seem to be the two most important things to accomplish this month:

Wedding Countdown Calendar:

12 months:
-Announce your engagement
-Choose a wedding theme and style
-Work out a basic budget
-Research reception venues
-Determine number of guests
-Look through magazines for attire ideas
-Research wedding pros (photographers, videographers, reception bands or DJs, ceremony musicians). Set up appointments, review portfolios, tapes and recordings
-Meet potential wedding consultants; obtain bids


11 months:
-Select a wedding consultant and meet to discuss details
-Determine theme/decorations for your reception
-Meet with several caterers; arrange for tastings
-Select and book a caterer
-Reserve musicians/DJ for reception
-Determine ceremony musicians and make musical selections
-Book wedding videographer and photographer; make a list of photos, such as ceremony and receptions shots
-Research and interview florists
-Select and reserve your ceremony venue and schedule a rehearsal time
-Choose reception venue; negotiate contract; leave a deposit
-Secure parking and/or transportation for your guests at the reception location
-Visit local bridal stores to browse their selection of gowns
-Choose your wedding party members and ask them to participate in your wedding
-Meet with your officiant to discuss the ceremony
-Determine your honeymoon budget
-Mail save-the-date notices for a destination wedding

10 months
-Select and order your wedding gown
-If your ceremony or reception will be held in a park or recreational area, obtain necessary permits
-Discuss attendants’ duties with your maid of honor and bridesmaids

9 months
-Register for gifts
-Coordinate with vendors to incorporate your theme/style into all aspects of your wedding
-Decide on the food and liquor to be served at your reception
-Prepare a playlist of wedding-reception musical selections
-Select and order your headpiece, veil, gloves and shoes
-Confirm orders of and delivery date for your wedding attire
-Research airline, hotel and rental-car reservations for guests

8 months
-Go to first gown fitting; invite your maid of honor to attend
-Choose and order bridesmaid dresses and accessories
-Research a variety of wedding ring styles
-Select florist; discuss wedding theme and style

7 months
-Review and finalize your wedding details with consultant
-Notify bridesmaids about dress fittings
-Discuss attire with groomsmen and make referrals to local formalwear store
-Select attire for flower girl and/or ring bearer
-Determine the design, wording, font and paper stock for your wedding invitations, stationery, table cards and thank you notes; finalize order
-Arrange a printer or hire a calligrapher for table cards
-Determine order of ceremony events and choose appropriate wording for your programs
-Negotiate rates and book a block of hotel rooms for guests
-Select and order your wedding rings
-Purchase bridal accessories: jewelry, lingerie and so on
-Choose and order something fun for guests to throw after your ceremony (rose petals, confetti or birdseed)

6 months
-Review and approve proofs of invitations and stationery
-Discuss the type of honeymoon you want, start reading up on potential destinations and consult a travel agent for ideas and suggestions

5 months
-Order table cards; place print order for programs
-Finalize choice of honeymoon destination
-Taste a variety of wedding cakes and select a baker; place cake order and arrange for delivery
-Make reservations for rehearsal dinner and select menu

4 months
-Determine method of addressing invitations and hire a calligrapher, if applicable
-Print labels and hand-address or have a calligrapher address invitations
-Choose your wedding vows
-Have groom try on tuxedos
-Purchase or rent groom’s wedding accessories
-Make honeymoon reservations and place all deposits

3 months
-Review and approve wedding announcement and printed program proofs
-Book venue or secure reservations for post-wedding brunch
-Discuss bachelorette party plans with your attendants
-Plan your bridesmaids’ luncheon or dinner
-Make appointments with stylist to discuss your wedding hairstyle
-Create hotel information cards and maps to include with your invitations

2 months
-Secure a wedding-day dressing room for your bridesmaids
-Weigh, purchase postage for and mail invitations
-Go to final gown fitting; arrange for pickup or delivery
-Have groom’s formal wear fitted
-If you plan to have a prenuptial agreement, meet with your attorney to discuss it
-Purchase attendants’ gifts
-Arrange transportation for bride and groom from the ceremony site to the reception

6 weeks
-Send rehearsal dinner invitations
-Write thank you notes as you receive gifts
-Confirm music selections (“playlist”) with musicians and/or DJ
-Select menu for post-wedding brunch
-Purchase a gift for your fiancé
-Shop for wedding favors
-Purchase honeymoon clothing, luggage and accessories
-Go for a practice hairstyling and schedule a day-of wedding hair appointment

4 weeks
-Confirm floral order and arrange for delivery times
-Meet with ushers and assign duties
-Discuss the details of your ceremony with your officiant
-Determine the placement or distribution of programs at the ceremony venue
-Arrange for preparation, storage and break areas for musicians/DJs at the reception venue
-Determine seating arrangements for guests
-Go in for a dry run with a professional make up artists and schedule a day-of-wedding appointment
-Schedule a manicure/pedicure for the day before your wedding
-Finalize details with photographer and videographer
-Finalize honeymoon plans and confirm all reservations
-Arrange for transportation to and from the airport
-Post announcement and photo on your website
-Arrange for table card setup at reception venue
-Schedule pickup/return of groom’s formalwear

3 weeks
-Finalize list of reception guests
-Give the final headcount to the caterer and review details
-Arrange for delivery of flowers and other decorations on the big day
-Call anyone who has not responded to his or her invitation

1 week
-Confirm your honeymoon travel arrangements
-Start packing for your honeymoon
-Pick up your wedding dress

Wedding day
-Eat a good breakfast
-Attend hairstyle appointment
-Give yourself plenty of time to get ready
-Relax and enjoy yourself

Post-wedding: 3 days
-Arrange for transport of gifts
-Have family or friends mail wedding announcements

After the honeymoon
-Take wedding gown and veil to dry cleaners who specializes in gown preservation
-Submit name-change forms for driver’s license, passport, Social Security card, state and federal tax boards, banks, credit cards and so on.

I'm trying not to get too far ahead of myself, though before reading this time-line, I'd already done several items way before schedule. I've made 6 bouquets of flowers (mine and one for each bridesmaid). And almost all of my bridesmaids have already purchased their dresses. I have also selected and ordered my wedding dress. But this budget part has really been throwing a wrench into things. Neither of us is willing to go into debt to make this wedding happen, so we have been trying to figure out both how to do things affordably and then to do it affordably, how soon could we make this wedding happen? That question has taken a lot more time and research than I'd anticipated. I think there needs to be a different timeline for those who are paying for their own wedding and want to do so without breaking the bank - Start researching costs and calculating savings based on your income well over a year in advance! AND seeing as I want to do things DIY (do-it-yourself), making my bouquets and decorations, I think it's smart to start working on those projects ASAP. I'm having fun making the bouquets. If I keep up this obsessive flower-making until our wedding, we may not have any room left for the guests! Tee hee hee. But it's a big relief to know I'm not going to be up until 2am the night before our wedding because I need to make more flowers. At least I hope not!

But back to the question that titled this post...

We still don't know. But I think we're getting much closer to the answer. So stay tuned!

My Dress

This has been my latest obsession. And I blame it on my dreaming mind. I had the most vivid dream of this organza bridal gown with little polka dots all over it, but in a vintage, 50's style. I vividly recall feeling so "at home" in the dress. I'm having a hard time accepting that the dress may not exist. I've been searching all over - etsy, eBay, google images, all to no avail. I've been tempted to try to find a seamstress that could make the dress for me. But even then, I'm not sure I could grasp this dream dress well enough to even describe it to someone. I just want to find it. *sigh*

Don't worry, I'm not going all Bride-zilla here (or at least not yet - tee hee hee). Even the search for this elusive dress is kind of fun at this point. And I'm still easy-going enough to accept, I may just wear whatever. My big thing is that I want this wedding to be *fun* for Nick, me and everyone there. And I don't think whatever dress I'm wearing or not wearing will affect that one way or the other.